evil, suffering, and pain

It seems the most common tendency in the human experience is for people to equate pain and suffering with something negative or even something evil.

What if it were one of the only ways to a kind of lucidity? What if pain where a kind of grace?

What if the question of suffering didn't have an answer except that it lead to another question about reality itself, and choice, and what the human heart decides to do with what happens in this world?

Not being able to account for great suffering has turned many away from God, but also from sense, eventually. And that is not to say suffering is pleasurable in itself, or we should dole it out, or hunt it down... but nevertheless, it will come to us. It will find us anyhow.

I doubt whether what we cannot reason about suffering ever makes God unreasonable, but it certain makes us finite-unable to grasp. And I think it's the part out of our scope that we hold the grudge about. It's no sin to ask "why?", only to say "God, you are not good" which is at the core of the blame of suffering, and pain.

There are things I'm upset about, and I wish God had intervened in. There is suffering around far too much, and I'm not in on the why of it. I use to be far more upset about it. It seemed mad. I still have my bouts of frustration, but I think also I have to put it all down again too, and in some way say, "I just don't understand. I'm going to have to concede this point, but in trust not doubt you, because you have revealed yourself. And You have laid yourself out too.